I could be (mostly) happy anywhere, in a chair, with you, sheesha, assir manga, and more shai bi naana shukran!

What’s sadder than a croc in a box? It’s a tourist taking it home. Does customs have a form for this? No!

Mediterranean City where the corniche is pretty take me to proud old Alexander’s…

Lilyland Man, why did you open up our bedroom door, disturbing us at eight o’clock in the goddam morning?

You are in, oh you are in, in the embrace of the history, you are, you are

Architects and doctors in 2000 BC(E) could actually hear Imhotep inside the minds of architects and doctors.

It’s a point of pride what the Nubians are not. They are not Egyptians. No. They do not just want your money,
they want to be your friend. Save money till the end –
(then you fight.)

Fifty Topless Sunbathing Russians is the theme of this song.
How come it’s so, so sad?

Let me do it on my own, please. I don’t need your constant help.
Give me back my bags, and get out of my room,
and don’t you take my plate until I’m done.

All frustration stops when you hear this honk it’s two more Egyption people saved from sexu -

Parsley, a touch of salt,
tomatoes, and some cumin
a good salad makes. Oh!

Waiter screamed and spit and threw my twenty-seven pounds into
my face! It was hard to not collapse and get ripped off.
Oh I was shaking!

If I wash my clothes in the porcelain bidet,
will a terrible, terrible disease come my way?
Oh ants, begone!

Two more people on the bus than there are seats.
Here comes the station man. Will he kick us
off the bus? (Just look out the window.)

First day it’s charming. Second day it’s oh so quaint.
(Look at the donkeys and you’ll just faint!)
Third day it’s sleepy. Fourth day it’s sad. Oh, Poverty!

Keep it up Goma Goma! Keep working on your house.
When it’s done you can get married at last,
married at last.

Doopity dots and swoopy knots
hey na na na.
Sha na na na Nubia!

Oh if you want to ride a felucca out on the Nile,
please share your beer: your captain’s waited a while.
Chicken’s in the pot, the tea is getting hot and sugary.
I won’t sink you and for a good price!

The Suez Canal is bluer than the sky;
it carries water from Med. to Red, and ships
that carry freight trains.

Careful of the waiter who is nice to you:
He may take you on a shopping trip to the Grim City of Suez.
(Good discount etc.)

If it comes to pass that I must flee my home,
don’t tell them that I am raising children with no shoes,
chasing dates with tea, and leading package tours:
I love you Siwa.

Mish mish and hoch
just talaata for a kilo.
I’ll take a kilo, shukran.
So good; a mess
down my chin.

Taxi! Hadiet al-Azhar
merges with overpass
karunch! Get out and hail a

Land in Cairo, hail a taxi,
almost die-o, air is nasty,
eat some fetir, and run straight into traffic,
inshallah.